We all know it is almost impossible to post anything adult or sexual on Instagram and not get banned in time. Well this guide will help you post those sneaky shots and not get banned or even shadow banned.
Have you ever had one of you photos removed from Instagram because there was someone’s naughty bits showing? Or, even worse, an obviously obscene female nipple was peeking out at the unsuspecting and sensitive viewer?
We will show you some suggestions to not get banned in this guide like using ordinary objects, household pets, posing strategies, and even drug paraphernalia to hide the shocking, shocking parts of the human body.
Hands
A very obvious way of blocking obscene body parts is to have the person cover the offending bit with a hand or hands.
In the below pics, various ways of hiding the breasts have been used, including the photogenic crossed hand move, where the right hand covers the left breast, and vice-versa.
Note the use of black and white in the bottom right image. Many Instagrammers know that any black and white image is art, but they think the fact it’s art means the usual Instagram rules don’t apply… silly instagrammers.
Instagram’s moderators are trained to see the human body as a disgusting mass of obscenity, whether in color or black and white, whether are or blatantly pornographic.
The only way naked human bodies are permitted on Instagram is if they are dead, such as victims of accidents, crime, war or other atrocities.
The below is an example of a subset of hand blocking, this is hand blocking combined with blocking by an object. In these examples the girls have variously employed cell phones, soap, a fan, and a pasta machine to help cover themselves.
Cats
Holding a cat is a cute way to hide disgusting body parts. Even kittens may be used, but as they are considerably smaller than adult cats, you may have to use multiple kittens, which has the added effect of raising the cute factor exponentially.
Of course, other pets may be used, we are just using the example of cats here because we have tens of thousands of photos of cats being held by naked human females.
Here are more examples of cats being used to hide a girls shame. Notice that a large cat, such as this one, when used with a petite model, can hide almost all the bits that have to be hidden.
Also note, that in some of these photo’s the model is posing in such a way as to assist the cat in hiding her scary parts. The posing aspect of concealing body parts with be examined in more detail below.
The below cat has been trained to hide the girls errant nipple when in the over the shoulder pose. Most felines are not easily trainable, but this shows it can be done. The girl seems oblivious to the fact that her nipple is showing and thus making the image unsafe for Instagram. The cat, however, is aware of the problem, and covers them with his paw.
Cats and Graphics
Here a cat has been placed in a way that has allowed the repellent female nipple to be visible. So a graphic has been strategically placed to hide the offending part. Below we will further explore the idea of placing graphics. Note the variety of designs and colors of the graphics. You can let your imagination run wild when designing these objects.
Stars and Bars and Hearts
If the parts that need to be hidden are plainly visible in the image you wish to post to Instagram, then the easiest way of concealing is to block it with a graphic.
From many hours spent pondering the best and most efficient way of obscuring things, we have concluded that star and heart shapes work the best.
When added impact is desired, the use of a bar, with or without text such as “censored” is recommended.
Stars
These graphics are easily made in programs such as Photoshop and can be any size for girls with small nipples, they are almost invisible.
Bars
A large bar across a girls offending anatomy is a dramatic way to hide what must not be seen.
And putting text into the bar, such as “censored” makes it obvious that you are being a conscientious Instagram user and are more than happy to censor your work.
Here are some more examples of the censoring text bar. As you can see, it is 100% effective at blocking the girls breasts.
Hearts
A cute riff on blocking graphics is the use of a heart shape to hide things. The heart shape is versatile and as seen in the black and white photo, can hide both north and south naughty bits.
Doors
Doors are also symbols and can signify many things. In this image it symbolizes the hiding of the girls body as opening a door to closing the mind of the viewer.
Candles
These items are readily available in supermarkets, corners stores etc, particularly in large cities such as Los Angeles.
They also bring a reverent tone to the image, and appear to make the girls happy perhaps because they know the nasty bits on their ghastly bodies are completely concealed.
Drug Paraphernalia
This girl needed to medicate during a photo shoot, and the photo was made using pot pipes to assist the covering of the body. The marijuana smoke also lends a mysterious aura to the image.
Miscellaneous Things
Many ordinary household items can be commandeered into providing cover for a girls nakedness. In this photo the girl holds and old fashioned film camera to cover her breasts. A self referential comment on the fact that she is at that moment being photographed.
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We would like to thank littlegrayguy.com for this article.